"The Offering"by Duy Huynh
"Apology is a lovely perfume; it can transform the clumsiest moment into a gracious gift."
~Margaret Lee Runbeck
~Margaret Lee Runbeck
On Tuesday morning, I stopped in Dancing Goats to have coffee and get a little work done before heading across town to Marietta. I bought a coffee, grabbed one of the comfy chairs, pulled out my laptop and got to work. A little while later, immersed in my work, I was interrupted by two mothers with toddlers in tow. The women instructed the children to climb into the chair right beside me. (Yes, that is two children in one chair right beside me.) They then placed two chocolate milks and a crumbled mess that used to be a muffin on the side table right next to my cellphone and laptop. Oblivious to the rest of us, and most definitely to me, the two women headed over to sit on the sofa a few feet away, leaving their toddlers to irritate the you-know-what out of me. I felt the indignation rising up in me. But I decided to be nice and just move to another location. But "nice" is not what came out of me. Rather than saying, "I'll let you have this space for your children," I snapped something like, "well I guess I'll move since you have taken over this space." Ugh. As soon as I said it, I regretted it. Before I said it, I regretted it. As I walked away, I felt like a big, hulking, child-hating feminist. I felt mean and ugly. With every step to the opposite end of the building, I felt worse. And then it occurred to me that I did not have to let this ruin their day or mine. I could apologize. So I walked back towards the two women to offer my apology. As I approached, they looked afraid. Maybe it was my imagination, but I think they both held on to their children a little tighter. And then I said the magic words that changed everything. "I'm sorry." Immediately they beamed and said, "no, we're sorry." The conversation went back and forth about how we were all sorry for the situation and wished we had handled it differently. They thanked me profusely for coming back over to apologize. As I walked away the second time, I found myself smiling, feeling gracious and beautiful.
5 comments:
I love this story. And I love the very fitting description of you "gracious and beautiful."
I think we have all been in that situation, ie putting our foot in our mouth. I ma proud of you Pat, you turned the whole situation around, and maybe taught the mothers and thing or two too!
Sheryl you were up late :)
I have been swampped today, but wanted to let you know I love this post. So may times I beat myself up for not going and apoligizing - would be so much easier to just say "Hey, I'm sorry, that did not come out right". I will work on that.
Byron - you hanging in there?
Sorry I did not get a chance to post yesterday. I was in meetings all day. Yes, Gnomes, I am much improved. Thanks for asking!
I did read this post yesterday morning before Court, and I had an opportunity to use the meaning behind the post as I was arbitrating a huge fight between a husband and wife over some real estate. I reminded them of the spirit of apology, and they left the courtroom smiling, hand in hand. It was a good day! But for the blog, I might never have made that connection!
PatC, you truly are gracious and beautiful! Thanks for bringing us all together!
I hope everyone has a wonderful Friday and a terrific weekend.
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