Think About What You Think About

Whatever you do, don’t think about pink elephants.

Now, what are you thinking about? Pink elephants?! Okay, stop it! Don’t think about pink elephants! I mean it; stop thinking about pink elephants! You just need to try a little harder. If you really wanted to stop thinking about pink elephants, you could. You must not want it bad enough. Try harder to stop thinking about pink elephants, and you will be able to stop thinking about pink elephants.

I use this silly example to make a point. If we are constantly focused on the thing that we are trying to avoid or the habit we are trying to break, it’s impossible to be successful. Success in anything starts with our thoughts. Our thoughts determine our attitude, mood, emotions, behaviors, the goals we set for ourselves, our performance against those goals—everything starts with our thoughts.

The other night I wanted something sweet after dinner. I entertained the thought; I rolled it around in my head and considered my options. I looked in the pantry for something sweet. Nothing sweet there. I looked in the fridge for something sweet. Nothing sweet there either. “I could go out for dessert”, I thought. “No, I shouldn’t go out for dessert; I should resist this sweet craving.” “Some ice cream sure would be good,” I thought. “No, I can’t. I should just try harder to resist this craving.” I continued watching TV, distracted only by thoughts of my craving for ice cream and how I should not have ice cream. “I don’t need ice cream, but I sure do want ice cream”. As I continued to mull it over, the craving grew stronger and more intense. You see where this is headed, right? I ended up in Publix buying a pint of ice cream, and I came home and ate it. In the end I did the exact thing that I did not want to do. And in hindsight, it’s easy to see why. It all started with my thoughts, and my actions followed.

The point is not that we are powerless; the point is that our thoughts are very powerful, and we can choose our thoughts. I could have changed my thoughts by getting out of the house, going for a walk or bike ride, calling a friend, knitting, working in the yard—any number of activities would have gotten my mind onto something else. The choice was mine, and I chose to continue in the same thought pattern, and before long, my actions followed.

Just because a thought pops in your head doesn’t mean you have to let it take up residence. You can choose to replace it with a new thought, and in so doing, you can choose a new action.